Date Your Celebrity Crush
by anxofdoom
Summary: School's out and summer's in! I would like to take a moment to graciously thank my best friend Trish for signing me up for 'Celebri-Dates', where I have to date pop sensation Austin Moon for an entire month. Did I mention he's my favorite singer? Oh, and did I also mention that he's a complete jerk in real life? Life can't get any better - because it's only going to get worse.
1. Prologue

"You did WHAT now?!" I shrieked, my voice piercing through the entire living room. I was raging with fury – scratch that, I was seething with rage.

The curly-haired Latina standing in front of me shrugged. "I thought it would be a good chance for you to finally get to meet him!" she said defensively as she crossed her arms.

Let me fill you in on everything just in case you're confused. Basically, Trish de la Rosa, my wackledoodle of a best friend, decided to sign me up for this reality show called 'Celebri-Dates'. In my opinion, the show was just a stupid gimmick by the cable network to attract teenagers with raging hormones for extra dough because their other shows were achieving abysmal ratings. I mean, have you seen their "hit" television series 'Mackenzie Falls'? That show is _ridiculously_ dramatic (though its lead actor is ridiculously hot).

'Celebri-Dates' basically picks one "lucky" fan to date their celebrity crush for a month. After the month, they would go on the show for one hour to talk about how amazing their relationship was, how hot their celeb boyfriend/girlfriend was, how envious all their stupid friends were and so on.

And Trish happened to sign me up for this thing because she saw that my favorite singer, Austin Moon, was on the list of 'available' singers on the website. He's talented and all, but I love him for his music. I'm pretty sure he's a different person off-camera than he portrays himself to be in all those interviews.

Imagine – me, Ally Dawson, on a reality TV show? I'd much rather lick the sole of my shoe.

I sighed. "Whatever. I'm pretty sure I won't be picked anyway since he has a plethora of fans who have probably also applied to date him," I said.

"Uh, Ally?" Trish asked feebly. Uh oh, I wasn't getting a good vibe from her tone…

"What?"

"You were chosen."

* * *

**Author's Note:**

I'm back with a brand new multi-chapter story! Woohoo!

I got this idea from the Forty Days of Dating thing that has recently gone viral.

I hope you guys will enjoy this story — it's going to be romance/humor as usual. This story is somewhat similar to one of my older stories 'Teen Idol', where Austin is a star and Ally is a normal girl. I personally don't believe in falling in love with someone you've only known for a few months but reading stories like these just make you want to go, "Aww, that's so sweet!", doesn't it?

This chapter is ridiculously short (321 words) but then again, it's just a short little prologue/introduction to what the story's going to be all about. I promise that the rest of the chapters will be at least thrice the length of this one.

Let me know what you think — suggestions, criticism and compliments are welcome as usual. Looking forward to hearing from you all and I can't wait to share 'Date Your Celebrity Crush' with everyone!


	2. Chapter 1

How would I describe Austin Moon?

He's a hunk, that's for sure. He has a great voice that is easily recognizable and distinguishable, he writes great music that speaks to my soul, he's multi-talented and did I mention that he's a hunk? He's so hot, I could fry omelettes on him.

Sure, I idolized him, but I would never go to the extent of actually wanting to date him. Every girl in the world wants the honor of being Mrs Austin Moon, except for me. Unlike most girls, I'm a level-headed person who knows where to draw the extremely thin line between admiring a singer's talents and obsessing over a celebrity.

You would think that I would be excited about dating Hollywood's most lusted-after heartthrob, but I'm not. Wow, I can already hear the throngs of female teenagers screaming, "What the hell, Ally Dawson?!" Even my parents were ecstatic when they heard the "good news." No, I'm not a lesbian or anything, I just don't want to actually get to know Austin Moon – that would most likely ruin my impeccable impression of him since most celebrities are completely different people on- and off-camera.

I received an email from that 'Celebri-Dates' show yesterday, congratulating me on my successful application. They wanted me to go on to the studio on the first day of summer vacation to tape the segment where I first meet Austin. They also clearly instructed me to, and I quote, "Jump up and down in excitement when Austin walks on-stage and scream as much as you like."

I tried to convince my parents to talk to the producers of the show to pull me out, since parents have more clout and all, but they refused because they wanted me to spend a summer without my calculator for once. Hey, I'll have you know my calculator is fully loaded with Calculus Sudoku puzzles where everything's basically like Sudoku, except you have to solve the definite integrals to obtain the numbers! It's even more fun than watching a Spongebob marathon and I _love_ Spongebob.

And so, thanks to my overly-helpful best friend and my very supportive parents, I found myself walking towards Stage 14 of Miami's biggest studio lot with Trish at eight in the morning on a sunny Saturday morning.

I could've been spending that beautiful Saturday morning at the beach with Calvin but _no_, I was stuck in a deal I couldn't get out of. Who's Calvin, you may ask? Well, he (or rather, it) is none other than my beautiful Texas Instrument TI-84 Plus graphing calculator!

"Relax Ally, it'll be fine," Trish said, petting me like she would a dog.

I hoped so.

* * *

"Ally, I'd like you to meet… Austin Moon!" Monica, the host of 'Celebri-Dates' said. They played the applause track as the blonde star, whose face was my iPhone's lock screen wallpaper, sauntered onto the stage. He wore a yellow shirt, a red leather jacket, ripped jeans and black converse shoes.

In other words, he looked totally edible. Get your mind out of the gutter – I said that because he was technically wearing McDonald's theme colors.

Adhering to the script I had to learn on the spot just five minutes ago, I jumped up from the couch and shrieked with all my might. "No way!" I screamed as I ran forward to hug him. I assumed Austin also learnt the script as he hugged me back instead of being freaked out like I thought he would.

The host introduced us and asked both of us questions. She asked me questions like how long I've been a fan for ("Three years"), how I felt at that moment ("Surreal") and what my dream date would be like ("An arcade date"). Austin was also 'interrogated' with questions like how he perceived the idea of dating a fan ("It's cool"), his first impression of me ("Affable") and whether he thought our relationship would work out ("Why not?").

I have to admit, it was pretty cool being in a studio with your favorite singer. Austin seemed friendly – maybe this whole dating thing wouldn't be so hard after all.

After the cameras were off, we were given one simple rule: we were not to hook up with or date anyone other than each other. Well that was easy considering I've never had a boyfriend and no one was interested in me romantically but Austin looked pained. So he was one of those players… Oh well.

"Let's get this over and done with," he said once the cameras stopped rolling. He rudely snatched my phone out of my hands as I was texting my dad.

"Hey!" I protested.

He ignored me as he began to type some things into my phone. When he returned it to me, I saw that he had saved his phone number in my phone and used it to call his phone to get my number.

"I'll text you, Angela," he said with a wink as he walked off the stage with his manager Dez following behind him. Dez shot me an apologetic look as he walked quickly to catch up with his client while taking notes on a notepad.

"It's Ally!" I yelled after him but he didn't even turn around to spare me a glance. What a prick.

Remember when I said that this whole dating thing wouldn't be so hard after all? Well, I would like to retract that statement. This would probably be more torturous than the time my dad banned me from reading for a week. I shuddered at that frightful memory – it still haunts me in my nightmares.

Trish walked over to me and put her hand on my shoulder.

"I'm sorry, Ally, I didn't know he would be such an asshole," she muttered guiltily. Trish de la Rosa was apologizing? Now that was rarer than berkelium. She must feel really bad for me.

I shrugged. "Eh, it's alright. It's just one month – I guess I can put up with him," I told her, with uncertainty shrouding my voice.

Trish seemed slightly more cheerful after my reassurance. Her lips formed a smirk as she nudged me in my sides and gushed about how much cuter he was in person. I agreed with her 100% – Austin Moon definitely looked more dazzling and dashing in person. Too bad he didn't have the personality to match his ravishing good looks. Well, you know what they say, you can't have the best of both worlds. Sorry Miley.

* * *

**Author's Note:**

Sorry for the late update! I was on vacation and I was going to update during the vacation but there was no wifi in the hotel I was staying at. :(

Thank you for all the lovely reviews you guys have left! It's great to hear that you guys liked the little prologue. I hope you'll enjoy the story. And to launi9 who said, '_up date because you were purposely teasing us with this. ;D_', well you're in for more teasing! ;D


	3. Chapter 2

I hung up the phone and threw it across my bed as I groaned in frustration. Austin had just called me to ask me to meet him at a McDonald's outlet to go over the rules of our relationship. Gee, I had no idea relationships needed rules. Apparently, this one does.

Austin didn't actually _ask_ me to meet him at McDonald's. Let me rephrase that – Austin _demanded _for me to meet him at McDonald's in ten minutes or he would call the entire relationship thing off. I may have screamed some non-radio-friendly words at him and hung up on him. I didn't care if he ended the relationship thing but it would look really bad on me if I did. Plus, he was Austin Moon. He could make me look bad to the media.

If you think I overreacted, I would like for you to know that he called me at four in the morning. Which sane mortal wakes up at 4AM?! Even I don't do 4AM, and I'm the earliest riser in my family of early-risers.

After three minutes, I was all cleaned up and ready to go. I hopped into the car that I got for my 17th birthday last month and started up the engine. It was pretty dark outside and I was still feeling groggy from my lack of sleep.

As I walked into McDonald's, I noticed a blonde and a redhead sitting in a booth. Yup, that must be Austin and Dez. I plastered a fake smile on my face as I walked over to the booth and sat myself opposite them.

"Good morning – what are you guys doing in McDonald's at this very earthly hour?" I drawled sarcastically as I graciously took the Egg McMuffin Dez offered me.

"Look, America, I don't –" Austin began, but I politely interrupted him by telling him my name was Ally, not America. He dismissed me with a wave of a hand.

"Look, Alice," he repeated, getting my name wrong once again. Dick-wad. "I don't really care about this whole shit, mm-kay? My publicist signed me up for this stupid show to fix the bad press I've been getting from my DUI and I can tell you're here by force so let's not waste our efforts by pretending that we actually want to 'date' each other."

For an asshole, he sure was observant.

Dez shot Austin a death glare as the stupid blonde just smirked. Oh, how I had once fallen in love with that smirk. My dislike for Austin grew with each second I had to spend breathing the same air he was.

"So, we have a compromise," Dez cut in, shooting me another apologetic smile. He handed me a file, which I browsed through to find a well-written proposal.

"You wrote this?" I asked Dez in disbelief. Everyone knew about Dez, Austin's best friend and manager, and everyone knew that he wasn't the sharpest knife in the drawer.

Austin snorted. "Puh-lease, like Dez could even string together a proper sentence without a boatload of grammatical and spelling errors. Just yesterday, he asked me how to spell 'orange,'" he told me, much to the embarrassment of his redheaded friend.

"That's true, I still don't know what the difference between o-r-a-n-g-e and o-r-e-n-g-e is," Dez snickered.

What on earth was an 'orenge'?! "Dez, there's no such thing as an 'orange' with an 'E'. It's just o-r-a-n-g-e," I corrected him the way a first-grade teacher would correct a first-grader. Except Dez was a seventeen year old teenager.

Austin shook his head. "Don't listen to Anneliese. The one with an 'E' refers to the color while the one with an 'A' refers to the fruit," he explained.

I was so gobsmacked by that utterly incorrect statement that I face-palmed myself, forgetting that I had a half-eaten Egg McMuffin in my hand. The bun fell off, leaving the gooey fried egg stuck on my forehead.

"And that," Austin said, pointing to the egg on my forehead, "was why we wanted to meet you at four in the morning. Imagine if the media had gotten a picture of the glamorous Austin Moon with the klutzy Ally Dawson!"

Oh, so _now_ he chooses to get my first name AND my last name right?

"Gee, thanks. So, what am I here for again?" I asked as I wiped off the oil from my forehead with a napkin.

The pair in front of me shook their heads. "That was all. Just go home and read through the proposal and we'll let you know when you're needed," Mr Superstar said condescendingly.

Hold on. What the actual fuc – fucoxanthin?

I laughed bitterly. "So you're telling me that I woke up at four a.m. and drove _all_ the way here just to teach you how to spell 'orange' and to have an egg stuck on my forehead?"

Dez nodded. "Pretty much. Oh, and to collect your homework," he reminded me, gesturing to the blue file containing the five-paged proposal.

"And to eat the Egg McMuffin I generously sponsored," Austin reminded me in a bragging tone, as if buying me a cheap little burger made him a Samaritan.

I took the file in one hand and my purse in the other and stood up. "Well, it's been nice doing business with you. Give me a call when you need me to salvage your crumbling career, superstar," I spat as I turned on my heel and walked away.

As I pushed open the door that clearly instructed its users to 'pull', I heard a faint yell from the voice that made millions of girls around the world swoon: "I prefer the term _megastar_, Ashley!"

I didn't know whether to laugh or cry. During my five-minute drive home (yeah, I kinda exaggerated the distance between my house and McDonald's to guilt-trip Austin, which obviously didn't work out the way I wanted it to), I conjured up a pros and cons list in my head.

Pro: I get to hang out with my favorite singer in the world for an entire month!

Con: My now-ex-favorite-singer-in-the-world happens to be the biggest jerk-face in the world, apart from Dallas Torres who rejected me in front of the entire school when I professed my undying love for him during lunch in third grade.

Pro: My popularity in school would probably skyrocket, making my senior year a blissful one.

Con: I don't give two shi – shih-tzus about popularity. Plus, I'm pretty well-liked in school… I think. I'm just one of those girls who gel well with people from all cliques.

Pro: I get to be on television.

Con: Although I got over my stage fright last year, I still get the heebie-jeebies whenever I think about actually standing before an audience. The studio taping two days ago freaked me out big-time and there wasn't even a live audience!

Pro: I might fall in love with Austin Moon. Well, 'Celebri-Dates' _did_ result in Selena tying the knot with the fan she dated for the show!

Con: How is falling in love with Austin Moon even a pro?! Ain't gonna happen, sista.

Pro: It could – oh look, I'm home!

I parked my car outside the house and walked into the house as silently as I could. It wasn't that my parents would be mad that I "snuck" out at four a.m. – in fact, they'd be elated that their little girl was finally getting herself a life – but I was just a considerate child who didn't want to disturb the two people who gave her life.

Unlike some egocentric, insufferable, narcissistic blonde singers. I'm just sayin'.

My mom always taught me never to judge a person if you didn't know them well. True, I've only known Austin for two days, and maybe there's a nice guy that exists somewhere very, very, very, very, very, very deep inside of him. But first impressions count and as far as I was concerned, Austin Moon was a certified J-E-R-K.

Entering my room and plopping down on my comfy bed, I pulled out the proposal Dez had passed to me earlier on and read through it.

I growled as I finished reading through the document. Oh, they were so dead! In the proposal, it was stated that I was obliged to respond to Austin's beck and call – whenever he needed me to protect his precious little reputation, he would call me and I had to adhere to instructions as soon as possible. While we're on our fake dates, Dez would call the paparazzi on us and we had to act lovey-dovey and pretend like we didn't even notice the paparazzi. Like we could ever ignore those annoying camera flashes.

Oh, and Dez would arrange for Austin and me to go for interviews and I had to gush about how amazing Austin was and how I was the luckiest girl in the world and yadda, yadda, yadda.

In return for my "services," they would "compensate" me with $10,000. Scratch that, I just read the fine print – they would be paying me in South Korean Wons. After a quick Google search, I found that 10,000 wons equated to 9.31055 US dollars. Fan-effing-tastic.

In other words, they were paying me less than $10 to be Austin's slave and personal liar for thirty days, and the entire charade would begin in three days' time, within the exact same timeframe as the whole 'Celebri-Dates' thingamajug. I furiously looked up Austin's name in my contacts and pressed dial.

"Welcome to Moon's Male Brothels Inc, how may I assist you?" a voice came from my phone. I would recognize that voice anywhere. I had to admit, that was hilarious but I reminded myself what I was calling for.

"Austin, I have a bone to pick with you," I snarled.

I heard an indistinct high-pitched "uh oh" in the background and heard some shuffling sounds until a thinner voice said hello. Of course, Austin would push everything to his trusted pal Dez.

"Dez, why are you bribing me to be Austin's personal slave?!" I yelled frantically.

"Uh… Umm… Wait, what's that Austin? I can't read your handwriting. Oh, there we go!" he exclaimed, which confused me for a bit. He then began to speak slowly, as if he were reading off a script, "Ally, consider this as a… monastery insensitive? Austin, what's a 'monastery insensitive?'"

Then it hit me: Austin was writing a script for Dez to say to me because his own Hollywood butt was too cowardly to handle little Ally-D.

What the heck was a monastery insensitive?

"Monetary incentive, you doofus!" I heard Austin shout in the background. Oh.

After some shuffling sounds, Dez cleared his throat and corrected himself, "Oh, I meant monetary incentive. Whatever that means."

"I'm not doing it, Dez."

"Tell Adele she's doing it or else," Dez said slowly, obviously reading something Austin wrote again. "Austin, I thought Adele already agreed to the duet months ago! I don't really see a need to threaten and blackmail her again…"

I could hear a raging Austin in the background, telling Dez to get lost and that he'd handle 'Abigail.'

"Look, Amanda, I really need you to do this. If you read the proposal carefully, you'd have noticed that we're paying you $10,000 for this. That's a shitload of money," Austin said calmly.

I snorted. "Yes, I did read the proposal carefully – perhaps even more carefully than you intended for me to. I read the Arial Narrow size 3.5 footnote that the amount will be paid in South Korean Won, which would give me a lavish grand total of…" I trailed off, not remembering the single-digit number I was going to be paid.

"Nine dollars and thirty-one cents," he answered smugly.

"Exactly!" I screamed in frustration.

"Well, you're still doing it," he commanded.

"Austin, I'm not going to be your fake girlfriend. And even if I were to agree to this farcical plan, I wouldn't accept your filthy money anyway."

"So you'll do it without the money?"

He wasn't going to give up, was he? I sighed. I couldn't let my parents, Trish and 'Celebri-Dates' down. If I were to back out, 'Celebri-Dates' would probably make me pay a fine for wasted costs incurred.

"Fine," I snapped and hesitated for a brief moment. "But keep the money. It could buy me another Egg McMuffin."

"Good girl, Amber."

* * *

**Author's Note:**

Wow thank you all for the great reviews! I didn't expect such a reception so early in the story. I'm so happy that people are digging this story!

I must apologize for not being able to update as often as I'd like to — I've been pretty busy with school and work so I haven't actually had much time to sit down and write. I'll do my best though; I won't let you guys down!


	4. Chapter 3

"If I were you, I'd totally try to get myself fired from this job," was the first thing Trish said when she entered my room after I explained everything to her in a text message.

It was two in the afternoon, ten hours after the little late-night meeting at Mickey D's. I had trouble going back to sleep so I spent the rest of the day searching up pictures of little terrier puppies on Google Images. Aww! And of course, I spent some quality time with my calculator Calvin.

"Speaking of jobs, aren't you supposed to be working at the beach resort right now?"

"Nah, that was yesterday. I got fired from putting sand into the manager's food. I'm working at the souvenir shop at the airport today."

Trish has had more jobs than Taylor Swift has had boyfriends. She practically gets a new job every day and has never stayed in a job for more than three days. I guess it was a pretty smart move on her part because she's so bad at her jobs that she gets paid handsomely on the condition that she would never come back to work for them ever again. Which was completely fine by Trish.

"Oh yes, I totally forgot. Aren't you supposed to be at work then?"

"Got fired."

"What did you do this time?"

She smirked. "I used the t-shirt making machine to print t-shirts with my face on them and I put them up for sale!" she said proudly.

"Wow, your parents must be so proud," I commented sarcastically.

"They weren't at first, but when they saw this," she said as she passed me a che`ck with her name and $500 imprinted on it, "they told me to do that more often."

I laughed. Trish was always up to her crazy antics and that was what made her uniquely Trish.

"If only Austin paid me that much to work for him for a month," I sighed. The dude was worth millions of dollars and was paid $50,000 just to show his face for five minutes on the red carpet. And all he could afford to pay me was $9.31055?

* * *

I hate the paparazzi with a passion. I get that they were just ordinary human beings who lived to satisfy their readers' inner gossip girls, but they were just downright crazy.

Let me rehash the events of our first date. Austin had planned for us to have a picnic in the park. It was supposed to be super romantic and according to Dez, super bloggable.

I have to admit, I did enjoy the date. Austin was quite the gentleman – if his true personality was the same as the way he acted during our date, I might actually like him in a more-than-just-friends way.

His chef Linda had prepared us a feast fit for a king – we had salad, hot dogs, sandwiches, lasagne and even crème brûlée for dessert! I sure hope Austin paid Linda more than $10/month because she deserved it, her food was splendid.

We heard murmuring in the bushes nearby and it spooked me for a while. Usually in movies, when you hear low voices in the bushes, you're either a) being stalked by a fugitive murderer or b) being `watched by a supernatural being. Apparently, Austin wasn't a stranger to this and he assured me that it was just the paparazzi, courtesy of Dez O'Connor.

As I was eating the scrumptious lasagna, I suddenly saw a bright light flash right at me and it blinded me for a while. I dropped the lasagna on the ground and laid down on the grass, blinking several times to restore my vision. It was terrible and I was seeing spots everywhere. I heard raving and when my 20/20 was fully restored, I saw that Austin was ordering a middle-aged man holding a camera to delete the extremely close-up picture he had taken of me.

I guess he didn't want my picture to steal the spotlight away from him. Typical Austin.

After he returned, he tested my vision by playing the "How many fingers am I holding up?" game. When he finally determined that I was back to normal, he actually apologized.

"I'm sorry Ally, I had no idea that he was going to walk right in front of you and take a picture of you just like that," he muttered.

"Wait, what?" I asked with a grin growing on my face.

"I said, I'm sorry," he muttered louder this time, as if apologizing was embarrassing as telling your crush you liked throwing trash away when he was clearing his tray at the food court. Trust me, _that's _embarrassing. Pfft, not that I've actually done that before… Okay, I did! But in my defense, I've only ever done it once!

"No, not that. You actually got my name right," I pointed out. He smiled sheepishly for a second – and his lips turned into a smirk as he replied, "Of course, how could I forget my dear Alexis' name?"

Here we go again.

"Anyway, thanks for helping me. You didn't really need to do that – a picture of me would really help with the blogs and magazines."

He shrugged. "Yeah but it hurt you and that was a problem with me," he said.

I raised my left eyebrow questioningly. "You girls and your romantic shit. Besides, if my fake girlfriend went blind, who's going to help me boost my publicity?"

Welcome back, Jerk-faced Austin. I hope you enjoyed your extremely short vacation. May I please sponsor your next trip to North Korea so you'll never be able to come back?

* * *

**Author's Note:**

It's been a while, hasn't it? I've been really busy recently so sorry for the late update!

I hope you guys still like this story! Let me know your comments/suggestions/criticisms :)


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